Sometimes....

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by Norma Jean Mccormick (Notes) on Thursday, April 25, 2013 at 1:16am

Sometimes you wake up from a dead sleep and it can be felt as "a bad thing"...everyone needs rest, but when the mind, or is it the spirit, won't shut down, you just have to roll with it.
Sometimes the wee hours of the morning, or late hours of the evening, can take us to a place that is quiet and still and our thoughts can go to places that mix with sad and happy. Times that come and times that fade, because we all know memories never go away, they just fade into the background, but sometimes, they can come back as crystal clear as a shiny crystal ball and you can go back in time and touch the moment as if it was right in front of your sleepy eyes. Sometimes it is a good thing to "remember when" even through the moments of painful realization and truth, but embrace sections of a memory that brought us the greatest joy. The wee hours of the morning as the clock ticks so quickly through the quiet will bring things from long ago to the front and as hard as you try to push it to the back, to dismiss it, it appears for a purpose. The past again, becomes very much the present, and you mind keeps you even more from sleeping. Sometimes the past is not such a bad thing. Look at all the beautiful music and vacations and the growth of our children, and loves we have had for many years and maybe some for just fleeting moments of time, but those tiny moments in the realm of days or years become the memories that will appear out of a crystal clear nights sleep and leave of thinking of those special feelings.
Sometimes it feels good to remember all the lovely people, places and things that led our lives into action to take a change or a risk and just live our life as if time had stood still and the only thing felt was that glorious feeling of freedom that made our spirits soar and the rest of the world stand still. The clock stops for just a moment and we can fully embrace what is really happening in our life. Sometimes the days will fly by and the moments will become hours, that we desperately want to slow down or stop and freeze this day just for a little while and maybe steal an extra hour or two to add to such a grand event or person that seemed to have touched us with a brilliance that sent us soaring into the unknown. Sometimes, instead of fighting the urge to crawl back in bed, I will just surrender to the time that is being stolen by my mind which needs so desperately to prepare for the day ahead, and I will go back into my mental scrapbook and relive the moments that brought me such joy. Sometimes, joy can turn to a tiny tear, but even if sadness becomes accustomed to attaching itself to that memory, I will quickly dismiss it as quickly as it came and just remember the warm embrace, the laughter, the nachos, the beach with a slowly setting sun and breeze that forever touches the skin. The sadness of being different now will suddenly be replaced in the morning hours with the thought of the fortunate times I have had in my life and how love and laughter filled the cracks between the difficulties and disappointments that make up the true world. Sometimes we want things to go on forever, and they do, and then sometimes they don't....but we make them forever in our minds in the wee hours of the morning. Sometimes when you want to crawl back into the covers and curse the night as it takes you back to a place of long ago and far away....embrace it, and think of all those lovely times with such happiness. Instead of thinking of loss, or hardship, or disappointment, think of how all of those things have made you who you are, and how fortunate it is that the mind can carry you back to a place where life was perfectly perfect and the world felt like a goose down comforter waiting for you to fall in it and forever be warm with the beauty of memories. Sometimes I just want to be in my life for an hour or two and just live the moments with more time than I actually had when they were happening......Sometimes you have to give thanks for sleepless nights and tired days......You actually are living the dream....just awake! hugs

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What do you think?

Things have been quiet on the airwaves this week with the reflection of the generosity that was shown us in Christ. I felt emotional on Friday as I thought of the incredible journey that was taken for us. The faith displayed and the love that grew in all of us because of him. I hope you spent your week in a way that brought you joy.   As I thought of the days before and after and the fear and sadness that was given to Jesus to suffer so horribly....he pursued like the King he is...so with this history behind us, and this glorious message of unselfish love I began to think of my life...and my hopes.

What part does the Lord play in a marriage, relationship, etc...

Well, from my humble opinion, I can truly say, that my next relationship, and I will have one, is going to be one where the teachings of the Lord are the foundation. I truly don't believe that he expects us to live by doctrine all the time, as much as the feeling he gave to our world. When we look at each other in this day and age, I feel there is such a pressure to perform. It doesn't matter if it is at work, or home, or even church, there is always an expectation that can crease the spirit of good intention and leave it with a place that makes us vulnerable and afraid. A lot of relationships are like that now. We are suppose to be the "best" at any and all we do, and there is absolutely no way that can happen. We can give our personal best, but to be the best, there is no such thing. That is why marriage is such an ultimate compliment and union that should be the strongest ever. Marriage provides someone who accepts, hopefully, and loves, hopefully, with unconditional support and trust. Just like God says to us that we have to have faith and believe, that is no different than marriage. The two are parallel. Both relationships take the time and energy of having a strong faith. God provides a foundation that allows us to fall, but remember that falling brings us to a stronger place as the practice of falling frees us to be safe with someone. That can only give us strength. When we fall, and a spouse is there to hold us up, help us up, and support us if our legs are weary, then we have the faith in each other that God wants us to have for him. It is all a teaching, learning, believing, experience. I know I may sound off my rocker, but when God talks of us in words that offend others when they read them, like "obey"....I do not believe that he meant for us to be slaves to each other in any form, or that he meant it in a fashion where women were less than man. The human race has taken the opportunity to once again decipher the words of scripture and put a negative turn on it. Obey means, to yourself, your heart, your soul, your spirit. Obey to me means, that we take our marriage and we obey the laws of trust, truth, and love. It wasn't meant to single out one person in a relationship to have supreme power or guidance over another. God would not of formed such a perfect and wonderful union had he expected that. But if we do not "Obey" such given boundaries then where will that lead us? I do not believe a marriage should be alive and well in a place where physical abuse, mental abuse, or spiritual abuse is present.   It is most important that the feeling of peace surround the love that you represent. Peace is not necessarily perfect days, or perfect times where life is rosy with no miscommunication or strife....It is peace in knowing that when you have hit a rocky shore  above all else, the marriage will be protected.  Hopefully,  the teachings of God and the abundance of feelings that he has instilled in us is not for not........I believe that he formed us to have a balance that gave us temptation, but the strength to make decision based on following what is right in our hearts.....We are such complex and deep creatures and each and every one of us is as deep and complex as Jesus. But was he really? He was humble, simple and believed the principals that we are to "love one another". He gave us the tools, but instead of building a firm foundation for our lives and marriage, we use the jackhammers and destroy what is the very key to what he wants for us. Peace, faith and for us to believe in each other.....That is not a bad thing. That is a good thing. Part of the position of church and the community of church is accountability......Men are accountable to other men and the fellowship can either make us stronger, or tear us down, but if a Christian man is there to support Christian men, they will call them on their actions and hopefully give them gentle guidance back to the real  and their purpose in family and society. Women as well. Fellowship in church with women is a gathering of different needs too. The support of each other is an extension of self. Instead of the focus constantly on self, it MAKES you be available to others and accountable to the church which takes away from always thinking of self. It can happen......unfortunately. I am not perfect, but in my future husband's eyes I would love to be. ... and him to me. No we are not perfect, but together we are perfect. Not in every sense of the word, but in our relationship the combining of both our traits and spirits, we create an imperfect perfectly wonderful place, good, or bad at given times, challenging and free at others.....It all is part of the "big picture". People have not put that piece together yet. You know it really isn't that hard.....It really is easy......People, society have made it a race to the end. .... There is no race. We all need to get off the speedway and slow down and take a nice slow walk holding the hand of someone we love. Next time you see a couple, be that woman and child, or father and child, young and old, alike.......Look at the amazing connection of something as simple as holding a hand......"We are connected"....We have to be...He made us in his eyes.......

Happy Easter Sunday my friend. I can keep writing as I have tons of things I feel for the life and it isn't the standard view. No offense to anything I say is intended. I just think outside the box.......Hugs and love from Phoenix. (hope you weren't bored)! 

Sing a little song won't ya hon.....

It amazes me in my life how much music has attached itself to the soul,  where as every note of a particular song can take you back to a time of good, and sometimes painful memories.  I love music.  It lifts me up, it surrounds me with thought.  It brings me joy.  It tugs at my heart strings like a hunter with a bow.  You pull it back and the arrow flies straight for the target with precision, making the greatest of men envious of the talent.  Nothing can get me going like music.  I love every type there is.  I can find a lovely song in every category, almost like a menu in a restaurant.  I fell in love with Bonnie Raitt way back in the 70's, with her bluesy tunes that made my heart come to learn the meaning of love.  Not the mushy gushy kind, but the kind that cuts right to the chase and you learn what true passion is all about.  How do you define passion?  I wonder if there are enough words.   I wonder how many songs we have in our memory banks that bring back a feeling of yesterday.  I have so many and starting young, I would have to say the Carpenters were the ones that made me love to think about love.  "Superstar" was and is an excellent song that I still sing at the top of my lungs driving down the freeway with no care except being 17 and in love with my boyfriend for the very first time in my life........He loved the Carpenters and together we would talk, laugh and love life with that beautiful voice in the background.  Awwwwwwww.......such a good time. 

I wonder what we would do without the tunes in the morning to start the day and end the day.  Can you even imagine what the world would hold without the glorious sound of strings and drums, and guitars.  I cannot even think what it would be like.  So very barren the air would be without the gentle sounds of instruments speaking to us in a language all their own.  Who would of known that another sense of life would exist in the gentle or powerful voice of someone with massive talent that could rock the world with excitement.  In my life, I can name right off the top of my head the songs that stayed forever with me...."Come Monday" by Jimmy Buffett, for how ever popular and over played it may be, I cannot help but hear it and think back to a time when love had no boundaries for me, and I loved with everything I had and don't regret it for a minute.  That song can come on the radio and I can relive that moment when the world felt right and good and I knew without a doubt that the most wonderful guy in the universe cared about ME, and I could be me and love like I always dreamed and feel with a powerful trust that just seemed to be the something I needed to believe. ......I loved it!  Still do, I keep it tucked neatly away in a very private part of my heart and can always rekindle a feeling of great joy just by that song...Wonderful way to recall all that I came to know as real.   As days travel into weeks and weeks into months, it is nice to know that the life being spent on something so terrific was spent with a lifetime of return.  A terrific moment in my world that made everything else small in comparison.  I love having something I will never regret.  This song reminds me of that.  Lucky girl I was....

Rock and Roll is here to stay and boy am I happy about that.  I love love love rock music too!  I think it is the power behind the drive.  It can make you party like a "rockstar" and you can accomplish so much with all of that momentum behind any task!  My favorite summertime treat is to work around the home doing chores of all sorts with the invigorating sounds of guitars and drums and anything else you want to throw in.  Better leave the Crown and Coke for another time, as that just detours the reason I started the music in the first place...but hey, who said you can't stop and dance right?!!!!  Wanna get some stuff done........Led Zepplin....addicting!   "Kashmir"......need I say more!  ( :

My life would not be complete without Van Morrison's "Into the Mystic".  What a down right sexy tune.  When you have great company and that man's voice cutting through your spirit, well there is no stopping what the feeling will say in a simple song.  If you have no words to express, no actions to show  feelings to the degree of passion that generates from  that music, all you have to do is close your eyes and listen and follow the words..........Nothing else need be said! 

Let us not forget about the greatest of all greats.....The Beatles!!!!  Cannot leave them out!  Ok, if I had to narrow it down to one....."In My Life"...it tells it the way it is, where life is real and time goes on but comes back to a feeling that belongs to no other...Just a wonderful display of words that jump right out and grab you and make you happy that love is something we can give to someone and feel so good about it.  What a gift....a wonderful, satisfying forever living music!

Whew....enough of that now, I better stop there....I just might get myself in trouble.!  Well you get my point.  Want something good?  Turn on your stereo or radio, or anything that brings that music to life for you.  You won't be disappointed as you take yourself into a world of moments and days gone by, only to bring you right back to it........All in a song, and that my friend, no one can take from you!
Hugs <3 p=""> 

Yesterday.....all my troubles seem so far away

Yesterday contained a tragedy that we all wish was untrue and didn't happen, an event that is so hurtful it shakes the life right out of you. I sat at work today with my good, dear friend, and all the wonderful people that I work with when the ding comes over the airwaves and notifies the world of the terrible tragedy in CT. I felt the tears well up inside my heart, as I looked at the front door and shuddered to think that something so life altering, tragic and frightening could ever happen to the kingdom I call work everyday. As our halls scurried with little ones who were celebrating reading, I looked at those innocent eyes and voices of pride as they earned their sticker to celebrate reading a poem that their wonderful teachers had guided them to do to celebrate the wonderful day of "Poem in your Pocket." I listen to the voices, concerns, conversations of dedicated school personnel who give their all, dealing with children everyday, from homework to band aids, lost jackets. It doesn't stop at homework, or paperwork, their students go home with them everyday in rolling carts and file bags that carry assignments and lesson plans that prepare them for the next day. The planning, care and LOVE....yes LOVE for their students is evident in the struggles and celebrations they share for 180 days a year. Our teachers share in conversations and dedication for their students everyday. Our administrators take on the responsibility of touching every child who enters the door. They celebrate their successes and help when the struggles appear and help is needed. You cannot separate yourself from that.
I don't even remember the last bell of the day ringing, as there was so much to take in that day. The normal work load seemed tremendous and the ability to concentrate was lacking, as my thoughts always turned to "what if." Working in an office where you are subject to any and all that walk through a door, and many many different people who come through on a daily basis is unnerving at times. You look, watch, watch some more, and try to keep the campus as safe as possible, checking ID's, getting to know the who and more of family units. I can tell you, we are careful and pay close attention to members of our children's family, but nothing can stop the destruction of another human being who want to assume the roll of ..... well you know. I found myself getting extremely nervous with all the activity, but I saw everyone from parents to kids to teachers celebrating the day, and I celebrated the wonderful opportunity to share in the excitement of a school. I listened closer, celebrated the poems deeper, and took a moment to just "take it all in." I was thankful and blessed we were safe for today.
I am so incredibly saddened as this event takes such a tragic thought to the entire United States. It isn't the fault of the gun, the laws, the politics, it is the doings of a very very sick person. How to help these sick people? What do we do in a place where sadness, stress, and gosh knows what else, is invading the minds of hundreds, and it is starting to consume our safety and freedom to live a life of peace. I don't have any answers to anything and I don't know what can possibly to done, other than to have more resources for people to turn too should they see a loved one, or close person who is struggling with issues that they don't understand. Maybe if we all just help each other with each other, the learning will begin and if one person doesn't know or understand, another will, and we can at least say we tried. I am sure the issues of CT will come to surface, and whatever events led up to this tragedy will come to show sadness in so many different ways.......I know that moving on today with laughter, happiness, celebration is difficult, as across the miles sits more tragedy with people we don't even know.....but we do........it is us....everyday in every way.....Love to you today, peace to you today, and prayer for you today and always.

Awwwwwwwwwww...........It's here....AGAIN.....another life altering event that comes like a runaway train, that cannot be stopped until it derails. There isn't a lot you can do about the choices of others, except to accept to not except. I believe in life of free will and all the responsiblity that comes with it. I don't think that it necessarily means that life is an ever going "free for all" where the total act of self consumption takes over the world and before you know it, hearts are left in piles of rubble and everyone is sorting through it to find theirs again. I love free will......I am a "hippie" from the world of peace and love...."no drugs, just hugs" to quote my wonderful cuz....ha ha....(love that cuz). I believe deep in my soul and spirit that the momentum you put into your view of the world will come back to you ten fold. But....what they didn't teach us in "positive school" is that when you see the world full of flowers and sunshine, there is always a dark cloud that can surface and you will be faced with a storm of grand turbulence that can translate itself into a natural disaster. Positive does create positive, but not everyone can live that way. Not everyone has the desire for the "good", the peaceful, the calm. Sometimes drama gets the blood to flow and causes false sensations of happy, when in reality, it is just what it is and the happy gets replaced with the world of make-believe drama. I don't like drama, unless of course it is on Lifetime and someone else is having to be a heart-broken, dumbfounded, what-the-hell just happened female. Is it really so hard for the world to slow to a pace that includes just having an open, honest, relationship? Do we have to get sucked into this place of "stuff is us" and make that the focal point of all existence? I question the world of TV that plays this grandiose role in our world where we are subject to advertising that displays the world of product as being the world. Those "products" are wrapping paper for others to decide how they want to view us. Walking around with the "fancies" is great, you look terrific, you feel on top of the world...but....what price are you going to pay? Does drama come into play when the charge card bill comes or the arguments for more more more money to pay for more more more stuff begin to surface, and before you know it, the day is cluttered with the fight for more, when you had enough to begin with. I don't have the answers to anything anymore. I just take the moments of the day and try to live them with honesty and devotion to the things and people that entered my life. I want/need my sons to know that life does not need to be about having more, but really having less. Having more causes precious time to be spent creating the funds to have the "more". Then time, loving people, friends, pets, fades as the commodity that does not collect an interest rate, nor can you purchase a loan for it, is left unspent because we are busy worrying, working and working and working, always to "get" a higher rate of pay to pay for the things we already have, and just think we need. There is a big difference between needing something and wanting something. Look around you.....do you really need that? Make a promise to yourself....Just today...plan on "spending" your time like it is priceless....you are a millionaire with this day...It is the most "money" you will ever have. Every minute is mega dollars and you must spend it with joy, happiness, honesty, peace and love....You already have a big enough bank account. It is called your life...spend wisely, you cannot replace those "funds". Peace

The wonderous eyes of a child!

Oh my gosh, I can feel stress building the second I step into work. It isn't because of people, it is because of obligations and the desire to please those that it affects. I work with a terrific bunch of people and love each of them for their wit, charm, intelligence, but most of all friendship. I know, I know, we don't "hang out" or socialize, or run in the same social circles, but the word of friendship is still meaningful in a way that is uneventful, but full of events! I know that I spend so much time at my job, and the momentum of the day sometimes brings us all to the cranky stage, or the overwhelmed stage, but through it all, when I see a smile from a co-worker, a gentle reminder comes over me and I know that the only place I would want to be is working with all of those great people. In my position, all the different personalities blend into a huge melting pot of diversity, which only brings us more of a view of life in general. I learn from all of them in their own special way, and that I am so thankful for.
Working with children is the ultimate experience. They come in all kinds, and their personalities can be somewhat of a test in such a restricted environment as a classroom that is overloaded with little bodies that aren't too in tune to the workings of structure! I just fell in love with so many of them, and sometimes when they come into the office, I look in their tiny little eyes and wonder what is going on in there that causes so much for them to react to! You have your little wonders that come from "stability" or do they, or the ones from "money" or do they...no one really knows from a few brief meetings or encounters. I see the parent rush daily to grab the kids from school because the price of day care is so intense that they cannot do that service for themselves or their little ones. Mostly, they are all doing the best they can, but now days, even that is not enough. The world is going at such a rate that the little ones are just running behind us adults all the time, just to keep up! That is at home, school, anywhere....always running behind an adult, who has created this monster of life for them to charge into. Unfortunately, the time to be children has pretty much left us, and now instead of growing up, we are always focused on them being grown....sad in ways....Which leads me to....
Daffodils....
We have a gorgeous teacher at our school who is bright, charming, classy and intelligent. Her beauty shines with her ability to deal with her children on an individual basis. She was given a student this year that was unexpected, but necessary. This little girl has stolen my heart, and the heart of many...No, she was not perfect, or behaved the way a little one needs to, especially for functioning in the classroom...but she did steal my heart. One day when she was sent out of class for disruption and there was no where else for her to "time out" than in the office. She sat for a time, but then she also reacted the way she had done so many times. Out of the chair she went and the blank look preceded her as she was coaxed to sit down and follow the "rules". I found from that moment there are no rules in a "Daffodil" world. After speaking to her numerous times, she walked over to a vase of flowers I had on my desk....she started pulling them off and throwing them in the air! Well of course, my thought was "Oh my gosh, she is ruining my flowers", but she was just as carefree and happy as could be. I ask her stop, and as she was running away with the torn flowers in her hands...she twirled and swirled and in the sweetest, little girl way...threw them into the air, and sang, "Daffodils...Daffodills...Daffodills..." all the while looking like a princess out of a Disney movie...it was amazing.
I love it...love it!!!!!!! Now, between my good friends at work, we utter the phrase "Daffodils", when the day becomes too much or our spirits are crushed by another! One tiny word, one tiny action from one tiny child...and my view of life was completely changed. Amazing isn't it, that we rush and hurry and get through the days with great triumph, but the inside feeling sometimes leaves us with failure. It isn't intentional, but the pace today leave no room for....
"Daffodils...Maybe as adults we could all use a little time to be carefree and throw flowers in the air as we dance away and rejoice in the beautiful daffodils, that steal us away from the hectic, hurtful pace of life we sometimes have to bare.
So my friends.....when the going gets tough, the tough won't get going...they will be dreaming of flowers in a field, and retaliate by rejoicing in "Daffodils"! What will it hurt to steal ourselves away with a new and perfect view! love...

Paper Paper Paper

It is amazing to me the articles of "things" we have, that go unnoticed until it is time to get rid of them. I was cleaning out my back room for the hundredth, millionth time and I came across a tote that was full and I mean full of stationary! Ok, ok, I admit, I have a thing for paper. I love writing paper, pens, pencils, anything at all to do with stationary. When the craze of journaling started to happen, you can only imagine how in my heaven I was. I love journaling. Back in the day in the time of high school, I took a creative writing class, and I was finished with the class about 6 weeks before it was over, all because I was a spiral notebook journaling junkie! I love to write, love to think of writing all kinds of things, so of course, what do you use to write on...........paper! In my tote, I looked at so many different kinds of paper. There are beautiful, antique looking cards, that have the yellow casted glow that makes them look vintage. There are the funny cards that make me laugh every time I read them, and I realize they are in the tote, because they probably aren't appropriate to give to anyone for fear of being not so politically correct. But the small cards, letter writing stationary, cards I bought for romantic times when I must of been newly in love and he was my everything, were in the tote waiting for me to pass on.

I looked at every single piece of paper in that tote, and realized as I was sitting in the 105 degree weather in Arizona, that the charm of a card or hand written letter is basically gone. We communicate with text message, email, and any other technical means we can, anything, as long as it doesn't take as long as putting the pen to the paper. You have to admit, there is something to be said for a birthday greeting in the mail from a friend that "remembered"! I don't knock the online way of doing things, but there was a source of comfort in knowing a friend thought of your birthday with a hand scribbled note on a calendar or a crumpled piece of a note in their wallet. I remember taking a newly given calendar that I received as a Christmas present and writing all of the birth dates on it, so it would be ready for me in the brand sparkling New Year. I bought my cards and organized them in the little pouches for the month, and at the beginning of the month, I would pull my beautiful, heartfelt cards out and make sure they were address and ready to go, stamp and all. Don't get me wrong, E-cards are wonderful and I use them all the time, but there is always something about the feel of paper between your fingers as you open the card and wonder what someone has to say to you on your special day. So many mementos exist for us, as we undo boxes full of child hood or adulthood memories from our parents, and the comfort of just seeing the hand written scribble, of "Love, Mom and Dad."

My obsession with stationary was multiplied to four or five totes, full of gorgeous envelopes, stickers for the envelopes, pretty decorations for the journals, and all the other wonderful things that come from old fashioned cards and letters. I sat in that back room for hours going through it all, and you know what came of those hours..........lids back on the totes with the stationary remaining there and a promise to myself.......That promise is to take myself, and others, back in time the old fashioned way. I bought myself a pretty new address book. I also pulled out my greeting card organizer, and got my list of birthdays. It is time for me to try and uphold an old and fading tradition........writ ting a letter to a friend, letting them know, in my own hand writing, that I miss them and cherish them. Birthdays this year for me are going to mean, I took the time a few days before, to write you a note, fill a fun card with confetti, and wish you a beautiful and wonderful birthday!

Did someone say recycle, reuse.........I say we recycle the old fashioned thought of a greeting card.....Can you feel yourself smile as you think of the friends that are thinking of you! Hugs